Godstone - The White Hart (Beefeater)

It Shouldn't Happen to a Vet

Tuesday 22 March


Walkers: Farty, T.B. aka Steve Carter v.s., Windy, Chris - 2 legs, Registrara (fully oxygenated), Lil and Clat. Sue update: - is making good and steady progress - good.

Find of the Walk: Jimminy Cricket

Distance: 7 1/4 miles

Weather: simply divine

A new walk, and ably led by Farty. T.B not best pleased to have forgotten his camera (Lil we are hoping yours will do the trick). Even though Farty read out her usual check list before leaving home, it seems that something got lost in translation , so, sans camera it was.

We headed northwards and upwards, passing some reservoirs and a police dog training ground, heavily guarded with barbed wire, and not canines.

Across the M25 and eastwards towards Godstone Vineyard for a coffee - wrong!! The cafe is only open April onwards, so we had quite a wait for an expresso today. Oh well, it was a beautiful day, the birds were singing and mountains of wild garlic to behold, and that kept on happening throughout our walk today. The warm weather has reduced us to tee shirts, and Clat discovered she had a dent in her bra, which gave for an alarming profile, so no walking sideways today.

recovered!

Along Quarry Way where we started an ascent of monumental proportions, with steps thoughtfully provided by someone in the past. Our two gazelles -Windy and Chris, now named Gaga and Gigi, bounded up without mis-hap, and the rest of us got there in the end. However, once up there, and proud of our climb, T.B. realised he had left his rucsack at the bottom - see, not his day, was it? Back he went, and we enjoyed some refreshment. Gigi, gazelled after him, and hauled him up once more, with the aid of her nifty walking stick - an excellent recovery.

We then found Jimminy Cricket smiling at us from a branch - we sang 'his' song, and continued our journey. This meant crossing a field - which was still being ploughed by the farmer, so we edged round it, and picked up the trail which led downwards to Woldingham School - it is very posh and in a lovely location, but we reckon the teenage girls wouldn't rate it, as there is nothing else in the area for miles.

A long slow steep ascent followed and we arrived at some woods and headed downwards once more. We passed a clump of beehives - no doubt the occupants now waking up and starting to buzz around. T.B. then found a jacket - hanging. His creative juices started working and he was soon rigged-up into a tall ghoulish figure - we have to indulge his whims sometimes. Oh well. Down and down we went, and crossed the m25 once more, and then a rather boggy field, which led to another road crossing before reaching the final stages. A tiny bit lost among the houses, but our route was soon re-discovered and we were home.
Lunch was surprisingly good - 2 legs had had a previous bad experience of a Beefeater (the one at Salfords by the way), so instead of her intended tomato juice she had fish and chips. Our waitress, Molly, was friendly ,attentive and efficient, and gave us a small talk on steaks and their behaviours on the grill. We have learnt something today.
So, that completes the blog for this week. Next Tuesday we shall probably tackle something on flatter ground - the gazelles will not be pleased! Will keep you posted. xxxx

Bletchingley - 2 - The RED LION

On A Clear Day You Can See Forever - But Not Today!

 Tuesday 15th March

Walkers: Farty, T.B.(Lord of the Flies), Windy ( the Gazelle), Lil and Clat. No other takers today, for reasons many and varied.

Find of the Walk: A Guinness t-shirt, which is very apt, as Thursday is St Patrick's Day.

Distance: 7 miles

Weather: Good - forecast incorrect as it was sunny and clear and then became grey and cloudy , not the other way round, if you get my meaning.

The Red Lion hosts were friendly and accommodating, so we parked there, and a table was booked for us with the words 'might be late' alongside our names. They advertise eel pie and mash with liquer - slightly unusual to serve it with a creme de menthe or perhaps a cointreau, don't you think?

We opted for the hilly walk in the shape of Rupert the Bear , with the promise of fabulous views from the top. Spring is very much in the air with the birdsong, and lovely flowers popping out all over the place - violets, primroses, daffodils, cherry blossom and more - winter is behind us, at last.

Our northerly direction led us to The Old Rectory, which has undergone an amazing transformation since our visit last August. The walled gardens have been restored, the grounds in general have been tidied and improved, with the addition of two huge flower pots - big enough to house a family. We aim to visit this place properly when the Gardens Open scheme comes into play, as it will be well worth looking round.

Several fields later and we came to the teletubby tunnel which runs underneath the very busy M25. Clat pointed out some chewing-gum lichen on a stile, and then we found masses and masses of wild garlic, so we got picking. The Ransomes Soup to be made from this vegetation is really lovely, easy to make , and doesn't make you stink.

From Spring Bottom Lane we took the steepest path up the hill - vertically challenged we were, and came to the top, where we found a man hot-footing, up from another pathway, which he told us was much easier than the one we had chosen - smart-arse.

Our Windy managed this hill with ease - she has developed gazelle-like tendencies and a stile is almost vaulted over. This, she tells us, is due to the fact that 3 times a week, she goes power walking for 40 mins and has noticed the difference - so have we , as we had a regular springbok in our midst.

Some shouting and a quad bike alerted us to the fact that a farmer was rounding up his sheep with help from his sheepdog in tow. We found a gang of them talking amongst themselves 'do i know ewe?' 'where are ewe off to?' etc., and another gang, being herded into a trailer. They were either going to the mint sauce factory or back to the baaaaaaarns for birthing purposes. We walked past some lovely holiday cottages on the farm: Sykes Cottages/Pilgrims Rest & Pilgrims Nest

The promised views failed to deliver so we headed off to the Harrow Pub for a coffee. Sitting outside in the sunshine was a first for the year, slightly spoiled by a seasoned and heavy drinker + girlfriend seated nearby. He puffed on his fag and shouted his conversation to us, and she said nothing. We left him rolling his old shag - and we don't mean the girlfriend either.

The sunshine had gone, the mists descended, and a chilly wind meant jackets were donned. We started our gentle route downwards and marvelled at the lack of views. However, the masses of wild garlic got bigger and bigger - the biggest we have ever seen.
At the bottom of the hill we crossed the M25 once more and had a lovely surprise, as a previously virtually impasssable ditch and stile, which we had had to hack our way through, has been completely restored and opened up. So we had a nice smooth passage - apparently it takes 13 prunes to do the trick, if you are following my train of thought.
T.B. was sporting his gardening jeans today and seemed to be pleased with his choice of trouser. Unfortunately, he had forgotten about the button flies on said garment, so he was missing for longer periods than usual, when it came to comfort breaks. Don't think he will be wearing them again, somehow.

Talking of trousers:
Lil took a tumble - her laces from one boot had tangled with the other, and down she went - we've all done it. Her fairly new, and clean trousers were quite muddied, and to make matters worse, now had a hole in them. She soon recovered , and we continued our journey. Nearing the end, we passed some delightful allotments, but alarm bells rang when we saw a woman digging a large and deep trench - we could just see her shoulders and head, as she gaily waved at us with her shovel. Something afoot or is she planning to have some massive leeks?
Within minutes we were back at base and into the pub for our lunch. We haven't been marking lately, but no faults found this week. The only drawback is that no dogs are allowed, even though the landlady has one.

T.B. managed to find a daily newspaper, which he likes to peruse whilst we have a good gossip, and reads us the odd snippet. Today he also found a local mag, and a joke which tickled his fancy.: 'A woman told her doctor "I've got a bad back". The doctor said, "it's old age". The woman said "I want a second opinion" The doctor says "OK you're ugly as well" .

And on that note I shall end this blog. Next week it's either Iron Bottom or Godstone at the White Hart which is a Beefeater.

Capel - The Crown

Capelbility Brown

Tuesday 8th March - International Women's Day and Shrove Tuesday


Walkers: Farty, T.B., Mrs Provincial (welcome back from the african lands), Windy, Hoots, Lil, Clat and our newby - G4Jane - who has been a friend of Clat's for over 40 years. Registrara was at her aunty's funeral, 12 legs occupied, as Sue was having her knee op. today, and Sally was on her way home from a trip.


Find of the walk: a big fat pussy (see photo below!)

Distance: 6 and 3/4 miles

Weather: wonderful
Lovely to meet up again especially after a break of two weeks, and with such an amazing day to enjoy.
The Crown owners were kind enough to let us park outside and we set off along the village high street. Life moves in mysterious ways - Lil espied a friend from the past waiting at the bus stop, then Sally pulled up , on her way home, with a bag in her hand for Mrs P. , and eventually we got going.

Further along the street we turned off into the  countryside, and came to Misbrooks Cottages on Misbrooks Green. A short history lesson from Clat, and on we went.

Big pussy!

Lovely views all round - Leith Hill clearly visible today, and the sun shone and shone. The signs of new life are all around, with the promise of a few

feasts for the eyes in weeks to come -marvellous.




Broomell's Farm, Greens Farm, and a short diversion to Tanhouse Farm, which has a shop, a cafe, and a loo - perfect. We ordered some liquid refreshment 'to go' - and then stopped. This is where Mon discovered her huge pussy and we took it in turns to stroke it (tee hee). The owner of the place invited us to park here in the future, and to dine after our walk. 'But you don't serve alcohol' said our Wind. 'Aha' said the owner ' you can bring your own booze' - perfect - problem solved then.

Refreshed, we set off once more - quite a few footbridges today - and found ourselves in some mudiness which is often produced by bridleways and the horses. We also passed several ponds with bullrushes, swans, geese, and some deer, which we were down-wind from (more later, tee hee hee).

Normally we don't see many walkers on our travels but today we found a middle-aged couple who told us they were doing a gps? walk. This involves using a gadget, and working out where to get to, to find a 'treasure' or object, and instructions for the next location. However, if you are Farty's uncle, when you find such an object, you do not leave it in situ. but bring it home to show everyone - this has to have ruined many a gadgeteers day. All the more reason to use a trusty o.n. map and some written clues instead.



Lodge Farm, Aldhurst Farm, through a copse, and an area with stunning willows on pollarded trees - bright red they were, and here T.B. had a slight manometer problem. The meaning of this will be revealed when you look up manometer in the dictionary . After recovering from this 'personal' incident, we reached the village high street. Here we said farewell to Hoots, as she had papers to sign, and we wended on a bit more. Our wend found us on t'other side of the road( as they say up north), and more farms and countryside. A little bit of lostness ensued, but we picked up the track, and headed back to the pub, where Lil espied her friend just arriving at the bus stop again - oooo er.

Our kindly hosts had provided a table for us, took the meal orders, and the food and service were spot-on. Clat tried to do a quiz, but some of the answers were a bit worrying. e.g. a female turkey is not called a Lady Gobbler, it is a hen.


It was still broad daylight at 3.30 p.m. - such a difference to the dark days of only a few weeks ago. Home to get tossing - it's Pancake Day!


We shall be walking again next Tuesday details to follow

What & where?

Good Day xxxxx

Absence or is it Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder!

Thursday 3 March

Hello Walkers

Well, there has been no walking of late due to all manner of things.

We are hoping to resume normal duties next Tuesday 8th and you will be texted with the details.

In the meantime, to cheer yourselves up from this miserable weather, I invite you to go to You Tube and look at Extreme Sheep. The company is called Complete BaaStuds - the effects are amazing. Enjoy xxxxxx