Rape and Village

Tuesday May the 4th go with you - teee hee

Venue: The Plough, Leigh

Walkers: Farty, T.T.B (Token Technical Bloke), Windy, 12 legs, Clatchat. Mrs Provincial covering the Cotswolds and blogging well. Angela up with Viv, Sally doing SEP - yuk yuk yuk

Find of the walk: an i.c. stone -whatever that means

T.B became T.T.B today, because he was very kindly answering our tecky. questions. Wind produced a camera which had appeared to self-combust, rendering it useless, but it was worth a try.

Well here we are again, back at a fave of ours, ready to do Leigh Walk mk I. Clat a little tardy due to being stuck in a crawling convoy of fairground lorries, and tractors- sandwiched between the Wall of Death and a John Deere . They were on their way to a cow pie rally, which puts a totally different meaning to the name Postman Pat.

The weather was unseasonably cold, with a nasty northerly wind, so it felt very much like we were back in winter. However, very soon our eyes and nostrils were met with the most fabulous carpets of bluebells. Tucked away in the woods, providing a purply-mauve carpet of incredible depth and colour -oops going lyrical again.

We travelled through several fields, including the one where Chris did her famous running away from cows manoeuvre, and dropping her satsumas and bottled water. No livestock here today, and we journeyed on into the Betchworth area, where cow pie preparations were being made, alongside vast fields of ripening rape (try saying that if you are Jonathan Ross).

However, cows were found in the next field, and the walking pace improved as we very quickly got through the kissing-gate and into a wooded area by the river. We stopped for refreshment and a pick of wild garlic, (or ransomes), which makes wonderful soup, apparently. Talk got on to the subject of the forthcoming elections and hung parliaments. Clat said she would be happy just to see a WELL hung one - oh dear. Then Farty and T.B. told us that on their recent travels they had spotted a proper sign alerting them to a 'Dogging Park' - any suggestions?

On past the Dolphin pub, where Chris peered menacingly through the window to be met by several startled customers - we moved on. A bit of road walking followed, including Wonham Manor where the deer are, and then the river again. We meandered with it for a mile or so, before breaking out into more fields and bluebell woods.

Towards the end we saw that the fields were being seeded with bright pink corn seeds (and not drugs.) The path had been obliterated, so it was a good job us seasoned travellers knew the route. However we did meet an oddly dressed chap going in the opposite direction who had no idea where the path should be, and was last seen skirting the perimeter edges.

Our walk finished coming through the churchyard, and soon we were de-booted and in to the pub, which was lovely and warm, even the loos, which are also carpeted - luxury or what?

The pub has changed hands recently, due to kidney trouble, according to Chris. Lunch was taken and eaten, and some beer-tasting also occurred. Mon produced a large chunk of cake from nowhere, complete with musical candle, for Wind and Clat's birthdays, so 'happy to yous 'were heard. Not to be outdone, the landlady then produced a whole chocolate cake with two candles, so the process was repeated, and thus earned a 5* mark for service.

So here are the scores: Ambience - 3, Food - 3 (Wind's mary rose sauce was for her prawn jacket was too spicy, and Clat's 'spicy koftas' weren't - cos it was in wind's jacket then. The ham egg and chips expert declared them satisfactory, but the eggs were a little cold, but all is well in the world. Value - 4, Service - 5* giving a total of 15/20.

So, folks, the next walk is Tuesday 11 May, meeting at the Duke's Head, Walton Heath/Tadworth.