Reigate Hill II - The Yew (Or Me) Tree

Tuesday 18th September


Monica's Meaningful Meander or
Seven Sisters (and T.B.) Scramble Surrey

Walkers:  Farty, T.B., 4 Legs, Windy, Lil, Clat and a warm welcome to Farty's sister, Viv or, 'Flea'.  Mrs P is still busy in Arrrrfrica 'eating, drinking, and watching the erection slowly rise' - Chez Viagara then?  Chris has contacted Ofcom and is now only partly connected, but at least it's a start.

Distance: 71/4 miles according to Farty, and 8 miles according to Sue.  Her mileage equipment apparently, tallies with that in the gym so it must be right!

Find: a man's cable-knit jumper drying out on a fence.

Reigate Hill was looking magnificent today - marvellous far-reaching views, and someNational Trust  folk out and about displaying signs for Gatton Park, and trimming their bushes - more about that subject, later.  Lil and T.B met a volunteer all the way over from little ol' Virginia , U.S of A - impressive.  Unlike the state of the loos here which have deteriorated somewhat, are dirty and smell - in a not-nice way.  Time to begin then.

This walk means we set off downhill and then along for a while before ascensions to be attempted.  We meandered and admired the views - cue T.B. and the camera.  Passing through the edge of the golf course, a couple of nannies or billies , a local school where the boys were practicing handling an electric fence and not succeeding, and eventually to Merstham (must go back to The Feathers apparently).  We arrived in Quality Street - so why not name ourselves after these traditional sweeties from way-back when?  Farty-brazil nut caramel.  Lil-orange cream, Chris-penny toffee, Viv-the triangular green one, Clat - coconut crunch, Windy - hazelnut whirl, Sue-nut brittle, and T.B - the long thin toffee with a hard centre (tee hee) - or are you just pleased to see us? A little refreshment and then across the motorway and the din of the traffic thereon.

The long hill climb soon presented itself , and the gazelles made light work of this l in 1 job.  Others of us stopped quite a few times and marvelled at some more views. T.B. got out his latest toy and demonstrated how to use binoculars .  At the top of the hill we discovered a very curious creation or art form,  consisting of rocks with wooden carvings of people on sticks ,with arrows surrounding them.  We played  spot the willy and left.  Fanny's Farm next, decked with bunting and lots of eccentricity, and a new Pudding Room for official functions.  In we went, and Viv stood around- meaning she bought us all a drink - thank you very much indeed.  We settled in the shrubbery and garden area, chatted, thought we felt the odd drop of rain, used the loos, checked the vietnamese piggies, admired the chooks, and set off once more.

'Time for a diversion' says Farty, and the silence was deafening - however, today is her birthday walk, and she can go where she likes  and so will we -  so we did.  Some quite pretty countryside ensued and after just one little losing of a footpath, and a bit of cowage, plus dismaying sights of fly-tipping and graffiti-ism, we were soon on another long, upward climb back to the car  park.

Short work was made of changing, and a quick dash was made for the pub.  The last time we were here was Clat's birthday, so it was apt that Farty had hers here too.  Good service and a good menu - hard to make up our minds, but before long we were tucking in.  A predominance of chicken pies was noted, and pronounced excellent, and the other meals were good, too.   However, Windy's arm gave us cause to be alarmed (I am trying to be dramatic here).  She had tumbled against a gate, and something had made her arm come up all bumpy and blotchy -  enough to look like Braille. Chris immediately did the empty glass test and announced that it was meningitis.  Farty got out her WD 40 otherwise known as Waspeze and managed to gas Wind and Viv with its contents - will this work?  Will her arm fall off? - you will know next week.  However she had to get away before long because she was meeting a man who was going to look at her bush, with a view to trimming it, cutting it back, or going for the full Brazilian - again, you will find out next week.   A woman at a neighbouring table developed a loud, and alarming-sounding cough - best that she doesn't book a table for Christmas, Dr Chris said.
Next week:  Farty will be advising venue etc., as Clat and Lil will be unavailabe due to hospital procedure for Dad.  It is likely to be in the southern hemisphere, but the location has already confused several of our members, so it should be an interesting day.  Do enjoy, and we shall catch up with you in October!! Talking of which, the week of Halloween will mean dressing-up for the occasion, which should worry the neighbours.  Poundland is doing an excellent line in the relevant gear, so we are  looking forward to creeping and creaking on the walk - Booh! xxx